as i grew up, my white friends grew up with me. and the number of them increased. i didnt see anything wrong with this. there were moments when i thought that i didnt relate to these friends of mine on a certain level e.g. commiserating with them when you told them your dad went to fetch a belt because you were being cheeky, or thinking about and craving that sunday lunch smell you find only at your grandmothers house after church, but this didn't phase me. this was the generation of the new south africa. we were all going to be friends forever.
i was the token black girl in many situations. for most of my life in fact. at parties, girls would introduce me to the only other black guy there and assume it would be love at first site. really???? the temptation to introduce taryn to the ugliest steve i had seen in my life was overwhelming. i mean, he is white too, surely it should be love at first site?? but this was the norm.
and as i got older and older, i started to accrue more and more black friends. i realised that there were other people who had been in the same situation as me. being the token, and having predominantly white friends. and not just others, there was a whole generation of us. and upon entering university, it was as though a whole new world had opened up to me. a place where this new generation of modern day black kids could all relate to one another on a level that no one else would understand. our own little world if you must.
my dad was elated about this progress, as he never failed to warn me that this sunshine and moonbeams world that i have created for myself where everyone rides unicorns and drinks mojitos, does not exist. there were innumerable warnings about the real world and the work place - "in this world, blacks and whites are not friends. this is the reality of the situation, my child" he would say. "psshhh" i would reply. but this thought always sat in the back of my mind.
i then started working this year, and finally saw exactly what it was what he meant. i found it alarming, but strangely enough, i was not very surprised. i walked into the building confident, feeling great and ready to make a name and place for myself. the reception i received wasnt as favourable as i was hoping for. "hmmmmm, this is interesting".
what i noticed, and have been noticing, is that there is a definite divide in the work place. the general tone is that there are the white kids, and there are the black and coloured kids. its an interesting thing to see in the working world, where majority of the work force are in their mid-late 20s and early 30s, and that this divide is still so prevalent.
but perhaps its because there are actual differences between us. cultural and social difference. there are things that, like i said before, i can relate to on a much better level with black people, especially this new generation. we were all token black kids growing up, and now we have all seemed to have found one another. we laugh about incidences growing up that few others, including our parents will understand. memories that only we will have ie metro fm on a sunday whilst you can smell the raja in the kitchen; your grandmother threatening you with castor oil as a remedy for any ailment you may have; the aunties who would give you those awful wet kisses at family gatherings, when all you wanted to do was be at home watching ktv; socials where you had to fall in love with the black guy/girl; people constantly mispronouncing your name. ah, those were the days.
we have been awarded a rare opportunity where we can define who we are as a social group and with social standing. the black kids of today. all those born from the mid-80s onwards (the 90s kids are another breed that we will discuss another day). we should be role models for the generations that follow. give them something to aspire to. make a world that we can call our own.
but these are just my thoughts.
#imjussayin
rabi
